How do you know when to walk away from a relationship
In this post I discuss How do you know when to walk away from a relationship.
Walking away from a relationship is not easy but could be essential for your overall happiness.
How do you know when to walk away from a relationship?
Breakups can be tough and traumatic.
But being in a toxic relationship for way too long can have an even worse effect on your overall wellbeing.
Chances are if you stumbled across this content, there is an extremely high possibility you are going through an exceedingly difficult time in your relationship.
The honeymoon phase is well and truly gone, and there seems to be a very miserable grey cloud looming over you.
I have been there before in the past, and full disclosure it was not pretty at all.
By coming to terms with there being something wrong, or something not seeming right is the first step to recovery!
And full disclosure there is a large possibility your partner may be a narcissist or sociopath.
Or worse even.
But before we pack our bags and run for the hills, we need to ask one important question.
Because by understanding this firstly is important before going into detail about what the signs you need to look out for in regards to walking away.
And that question is “why did you date this person to begin with?”
Sadly, we live in a very insecure world.
People end up with partners because they don’t want to be alone.
People are put into arranged marriages.
People have serious mental health issues and expect their partners to become their therapists!
This list goes on and on, but my point is WHY did you want to date this person initially?
Once you know the answer to that question it will help you in your understanding of the situation you find yourself in currently.
However, if you are or were so deeply in love and that seems like a distant memory right now and you cannot answer that question, do not worry as I have got you covered.
And FYI this applies to both men and women.
Here are 8 signs that it may be time to walk away from a relationship:
#1 – The Emotional Connection is Gone
Remember the beginning aka the honeymoon period, which was that almost magical time where you held each other, and it felt like a Disney movie.
All thing seemed magical, you never felt depressed, or down.
Whenever they texted you, or you were with them you beamed with positive energy.
But also as well as all of this you had an emotional connection with each other.
Sort of like ET and Elliott.
You felt the same emotions you were in sync.
When you were down, they were down.
When you were up they were up.
There was almost a mutual empathy that made your bond so strong.
But over time that has disappeared.
They no longer care that you are upset.
They are no longer supportive of your emotional distress.
And suddenly that person you loved and could trust with your emotions seems like a distant stranger.
This is a deafening blow, and I have suffered this in the past too.
I remember being with an ex and sharing my emotional pain and struggles, yet I was greeted with complete ignorance and narcissism and no understanding at all.
Your emotional connection must remain strong throughout, it will not disappear if you both are on the same page and love each other deeply.
Only superficial and fake relationships have fake or false emotional connections.
#2 – You Feel More Insecure
Again, in the beginning stages of your blossoming relationships your partner fell in love with your warts and all.
But time has made you feel more unattractive to your partner, especially if they have made you deliberately feel more insecure.
They may have been overly critical about your appearance, your dress sense, your personality.
And by shooting you down regularly suddenly you have lost all confidence and are incredibly insecure.
You try to look good when you are lounging around on a Sunday afternoon at home.
You should NOT be made to feel insecure with your partner ever.
That is abuse, and disrespectful.
You are good enough for someone who absolutely loves you, not somebody who wants you to look good as a trophy partner.
Now if you have really let yourself go, the blame may lie with you.
But your partner should try to motivate you in a sincere and non-abusive manner to get back into shape and feeling healthy again.
But if you are suddenly walking on eggshells in your own bloody home with your partner, it is an awful situation to be in.
#3 – My Gut Is Telling Me Something Is Wrong
Trust your gut!
This is not a cliché quote, it is a fact of life!
Gut instinct, or intuition, is your immediate understanding of something; there’s no need to think it over or get another opinion—you just know.
Your intuition arises as a feeling within your body that only you experience.
Because of this, trusting your intuition is the ultimate act of trusting yourself.
If you are not somebody who obsessively thinks and is chronically negative, you need to really listen to your gut.
I have lost count the amount of times my gut would tell me something is wrong, and I would later regret not following my intuition.
You need to be the same regarding your relationship, if something feels wrong or off, the chance is you are probably right.
It could be a million different problems or issues, but the fact is trusting your intuition.
You should NOT be feeling like your gut is warning you about something if you were in a good healthy and happy relationship.
#4 – You Feel Alone in Your Relationship
I remember sat opposite an ex who was a narcissist.
All she cared about was herself and her own life, nothing else.
When we had dinner, I would sit there and watch her yap on about herself and how wonderful she was.
And I would be there suffering in silence wanting to share how I had a great day at work, or what interesting things were going on in the world.
But I knew especially with a narcissist I would not have been heard.
My point being I was alone in my relationship.
I could not share my vulnerabilities, my true personality, or what was going on in my life.
If you cannot do that with somebody you absolutely love, then what is the point of your relationship?
To have somebody to eat dinner with?
If you feel alone it is most likely because you are ALONE in your relationship.
That partner does not want to hear or really care about what you are going through whether it is good or bad.
I know being alone sucks after a breakup but being alone in a romantic relationship is far worse.
#5 – Your Productivity Suffers
When I was in a toxic relationship, I was flying high career wise.
But soon as problems with this toxic person reared its ugly head my career took a nosedive.
I found myself constantly putting out fires, taking my eye off the ball.
In the space of six months my career went down the toilet.
My point being is a good healthy partner will inspire you to succeed in your passions and life and never hold you back.
A toxic partner will ruin your productivity, shoot down your dreams, and create just enough drama to disrupt your entire schedule.
If you have noticed that your productivity is down dramatically that is largely to do because your relationship is having a negative effect on it.
As I said already if you are chasing a goal or starting a business, the right person will give you the correct amount of space and support for you to fulfil your dreams.
Your toxic partner however will find any way to sabotage it because they are jealous of you and want you to fail.
#6 – You Become Sick More Often
The pandemic has reminded us how important it is to look after our health.
However, if you have found yourself sick more often it is most likely due to a toxic relationship.
The stress of my former toxic relationships always gave me headaches, back aches, flus, and colds pretty much all the time.
In fact, one of my exes said to me “my god you are ill all the time!”
The truth was it was the stress of dealing with a toxic person in a romantic relationship WILL make you sick!
You will be drained, fatigued, stressed and all-round feeling just crappy.
And FYI fighting all the time is NOT healthy!
However, if you only get sick from time to time that is normal.
A good partner does not stress you out all the time to the point where your actual body is telling you to slow down and take a breather.
Healthy partners make you feel healthier.
Toxic partners make you feel poisoned.
#7 – Your Friends and Family Are Concerned
I remember my brother turning to me one day and telling me how he was genuinely concerned about a former toxic relationship I was in.
I didn’t even ask him, he just sat me down and offered his support.
He told me that I didn’t look happy, I looked agitated and upset and I was not “myself.”
As time went on so did so many other family and friends close to me offer their concern.
This is a tell-tale sign that something is truly off.
If these people who love and genuinely want what is best for you are offering their cause of concern, they are most likely correct.
Especially if this happens after a period of time.
Look out for when they say things like “you haven’t seemed yourself, what is going on with you?”
Use these people as your sounding boards because most likely you do not have that in your relationships.
People will only offer their concern if they truly believe you are suffering as a result of a toxic relationship.
You must take solace in that.
#8 – You Are Overall Miserable Around Them
Are things going well in your life outside of your relationship?
Do you prefer being by yourself than with your partner?
If you are overall miserable around your partner, chances are they are the reason why!
There is nothing worse than being with somebody or even living with them and they make you miserable.
A good partner makes you happy, makes you laugh, makes you feel comfortable.
A toxic partner amongst all negative things just makes you miserable.
If you cannot even find joy in the simplest of things, then that is because of them.
Like an energy vampire they have sucked the joy and life out of you.
And life is way too short to tolerate that sort of behaviour.
Find yourself someone who brings a smile to your life, not a frown and toxicity.