It’s an age old desire to get your crush or the woman you are dating to constantly think and obsess over you.
But it is rarely spoken about how to actually go about making this happen.
Many dating gurus and attraction “experts” all give out the same advice:
“Make a woman chase you.”
“Play hard to get.”
“Be sure to tell you are dating many girls at the same time.”
“Give off the vibe you do not care about her.”
Whilst there is of course elements of truth to all of those statements lets dive a little deeper into what modern dating really looks like.
From Tinder to Bumble, the online dating market has grown astronomically!
Back in the day, meeting online or even on any app in particular was seen as “lame, gross, weird, or strange.”
Dating apps were given a really bad reputation, considering the fact they were largely seen as “ways to hook up only.”
Quality women avoided them like the plague to begin with, but as time moved on, and particularly as online dating became more mainstream too, the popularity for these apps grew even larger!
So now it is not a surprise if the next wedding or engagement you go to is of two people who have happened to meet online.
However, what comes with this is the dreaded word that you know to be true but don’t really wish to acknowledge:
You know the drill, for every individual beautiful woman you see on a dating app, there are 100 thirsty desperate men.
Then there are the jocks, the rich boys, and even depending on your geographical locations millionaire footballers!
In fact I met a girl off Tinder years ago who showed me her Tinder matches were mainly Premier League footballers who earned over £150,000 per week plus!
I know what you are thinking:
“How can I compete with that?”
The truth is, in the online dating world you really can’t.
The same goes for women who are not on any dating apps.
The average attractive woman depending on where she lives gets asked out minimally 2-3 times a day.
Also since she was the age of 16 on average she has been asked out, especially if she is out and about.
So as an equation on average an attractive woman gets asked out over 700 times a year!
Even if they are married, or in a relationship too!
So regardless of what you think or not, you are always going to be competing with many thirsty, and different types of single men.
But despite all this, let’s say you do get matches I will revise my original question:
“How do you make a woman think about you constantly?”
Simple, but putting this into practice can be difficult:
Dis-attach yourself from the outcome.
Ok, I know what you are thinking “what does that even mean?” – allow me to explain.
Let’s say there are two guys, John and Paul.
And let’s introduce a beautiful woman called Sarah too for example.
John and Paul are not friends, and do not know each other, yet they both are around the same age, the same build, and have a very similar type of look.
So Sarah matches on Tinder around a similar time to John and Paul as they all happen to be in the same 5 mile radius as each other.
Both are confident men and they arrange dates to take Sarah out.
They also have a great time, good drinks etc, and Sarah is pleased by meeting them both.
After their date, John keeps in touch with Sarah, and texts her on a regular basis.
Meanwhile Paul, he is a mystery, and stays aloof hardly contacting Sarah.
And while Sarah loves the attention John is giving her such as “how is your day sweetie,” or “what you up to later,” she can’t help but wonder what Paul was up to.
Suddenly insecurity sets in:
“What if Paul doesn’t like me,” she worries to herself, “was I too forward to him? Was I rude?”
A week or so later Paul sends Sarah a text, “you, me, cocktails at the W Hotel? I could do with taking my mind off work?”
Sarah’s heart beats with excitement, “he’s texted me!” she thinks to herself!
“Yes! I’m so up for that!” she replied happily.
But also at the same time she remembers she had promised to see John, who agreed to take her to the cinema.
“But if I turn down Paul, I may never hear from him again,” she asks herself.
And after a little bit of analysis, Sarah flakes on John to choose Paul.
While it may appear obvious what Paul did, it actually goes a lot deeper than just “playing it cool.”
Paul had an amazing abundance mind-set.
He knew he was a catch, and knew he had a lot to offer a woman, regardless of how good a woman Sarah was.
So he was unattached to how things were going to work out with her, because he knew she was not the last woman on earth!
Paul also carried that mind-set into his work, his lifestyle, and of course his relationships.
By realizing that things do not last forever, and that he was enough on his own, it actually made him almost irresistible to Sarah.
That is the key, he only contacted her when he wanted to see her, and without him knowing she was choosing him over other guys who were all doing the opposite.
This same philosophy can be applied to almost anything in his life.
By naturally believing in himself and not focused on the outcome, Paul was coming as an extremely attractive man.
Try this in your next interaction, be forward and go for the date, however do not be bothered about what happens.
Be careful though, because you may find the results utterly astounding!
You realize that life is short, and you are enough on your own as a human being.
Dating has become so bloody complicated with pick-up lines and rituals.
I am not telling you to be yourself but to instead be the best version of yourself.
And whenever you have a doubt always remind yourself, “I will not do what 99% of other men are doing and chase. I will give her space, and contact her just to meet up.”